James Middleton: The Royal Brother-in-Law is out of control…and zexy.

We weren’t really aware Kate Middleton, the new bride of Prince William (and now the Duchess of Cambridge, her official title courtesy of the Queen) had a brother but she does, and he’s a 23 year old entrepreneur (mail order cakes, of all things) named James Middleton and when we noticed him yesterday reading a Bible passage during the wedding ceremony we thought, “Kinda cute…very tan…maybe a little gay.”

James Middleton, Kate's little bro, all spiffed up at the wedding of the century.

Today we saw a post that featured a naughty photo of James in a French maid’s uniform doing unspeakable things at a wild party (drinking beer and grabbing his crotch) and some snark that James has quite a reputation as a bad boy and maybe a gay, bad boy at that…

Oui, Oui!

Well, that intrigued our inner perv journalist, so we had to do some Intertube snooping to find out the dirt on Jamesy…And, boy howdy, there is a treasure trove of Boys Gone Wild photos for this wild child…Many of them are mildly NSFW, so they’re after the jump…(good thing it’s the weekend…)

Mild Filth after the jump…mainly of the butt-tastic nature….

James and his Giant Peach...es

Maybe he has hemorrhoids?

Is he drying out the meat and two veg?

Like most men, he just can't keep his hands off them...

I never seem to get invited to the RIGHT kind of parties...What IS that? An Obierto link?

Does he taste like cake?

OK, the kid is a bit wild but, uh, he’s ONLY TWENTY THREE YEARS OLD! Probably 80% of college age men have photos floating around of them at drunken parties doing drunken dumb things, including wearing a dress or getting licked by a male friend. It’s not like he’s fornicating goats or wearing Nazi uniforms, (sorry, Harry, didn’t mean to remind you of your own follies…) It’s really not much of a big deal.

One thing I did notice in my research…the Middletons aren’t very popular. Lots of sites/comments devoted to how tacky/nouveau riche they are, (they made their money with a party supply business/website) and complaints they aren’t “good” enough to be aligned with the Royal Family.

Really? Maybe it’s the other way around…would you want your daughter marrying into an inbred dynasty prone to hemophilia, porphyria, insanity and male pattern baldness?

As for James, leave him alone.

Though he does seem a little gay to me…of course, many upper class British men seem sort of gay. They can’t help it. Something to do with the nannies, canings at boarding school and those carefully plucked eyebrows.