Author Robert Randolph claims he was savagely beaten at a Hollywood bathhouse in 2003 and subsequently BANNED from being a member. In retribution, he wrote a tell-all memoir that exposes the sexy shenanigans of its clientele and outs a number of Hollywood celebrities including John Travolta, (which isn’t exactly “news”; stories about Travolta have been a staple in the tabloids and gossip columns for 30 years…) The book, “You’ll Never Spa in This Town Again” is, according to the official website, scheduled to be released “Fall 2010” but it must be a self-published sort of book. No publisher is listed and it’s not currently available for pre-order on Amazon.com. Of course the story has been picked up by blogs/sites all over the world and the Enquirer is splashing the scandal all over its cover in an upcoming issue…(Disclosure: I first learned of this on Towleroad which then links to Boy Culture who links it to the author’s website. Convoluted.)
I’m of two minds about this book. My prurient side is desperate to read it, because frankly, I’m a sucker for gossipy tell-alls, but I’m also a bit revolted by the author’s snarky, vengeful tone and attitude and wonder why outing celebrities is getting “even” with the bathhouse that outed the author as a member? There is a “Photo” section on the website that includes some poorly photographed shots from the bathhouses mentioned in the book and some of the photos have captions like this:
This is one of many steam rooms in Los Angeles John frequents. It’s creepy – sometimes I’ll walk in and he’ll be in the steam room and he’s just standing there waiting for fresh meat
Uh, that’s a pretty judgemental tone you got there, Mr “Randolph” (the author’s name does seem a bit contrived and fake, doesn’t it?). I mean, YOU’RE IN A BATHHOUSE, TOO, BUDDY! AREN’T YOU ALSO THERE TO SCORE SOME “FRESH MEAT”? Dude comes across like a paid up member of NOM…maybe he’s just Maggie Gallagher in Drag King mode?
But, the author apparently doesn’t stop at re-outing John Travolta, the “Big Name” in his expose and the easiest star to write about since there have been plenty of other revelations about Travolta over the years, including the Enquirer story from the 80’s when porn star Paul Baressi named Travolta as a sex partner. Randolph also promises the dirt on:
Hollywood, CA, FALL 2010 – Find out what John Travolta, John Amos, John Cusack, Jeremy Piven, Pauly Shore, George Michael, Jean-Claude Van Damme, Billy Zane, Andy Dick, Paul Giammatti and more have in common — and it’s not awards!
Nothing too shocking about that list (well, maybe John Amos, the dad on “Good Times” and Gordy the Weather Man on “The Mary Tyler Moore Show”…) other than the fact there’s no one very “hot” on it; there are some FAR bigger stars in town with gay backgrounds. Either they don’t venture to their neighborhood sex pit or Mr Randolph was smart enough to avoid outing more powerful Hollywood players. And, no one on this list is very young; apparently “Twilight” aged gay/bi actors get enough action without having to cruise the steam room at their local gay bathhouse…As for Mr Randolph, he’d best be very careful; the Scientologists CAN’T be very happy that he’s gone after one of their “boys”. Payback CAN be a bitch.
-Michael Strangeways
