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The 11th Annual March of the Mistletomosexuals
December 10, 2022 @ 8:00 pm - 1:00 am
It’s Seattle’s big GAY Santa-themed bar crawl RETURNS, with awesome costumes, Santas, misfit toys, and more FUN than you can shake a candy cane at!
PLEASE follow COVID protocols.
Here’s a brief lowdown on the ho-ho-hoedown:
A general schedule:
The plan is to begin massing at CC Attle’s. CC’s is big enough to hold most, if not all of us. From there, we’ll begin our march on Broadway to the Pike-Pine corridor around 10:30 pm to Union, Diesel, Queer/Bar, and Pony; these are small establishments, so feel free to pick one. Many may want to go to the Cuff as the last stop, but others will wander back down to CCs.
The plan is to begin massing at CC Attle’s. CC’s is big enough to hold most, if not all of us. From there, we’ll begin our march on Broadway to the Pike-Pine corridor around 10:30 pm to Union, Diesel, Queer/Bar, and Pony; these are small establishments, so feel free to pick one. Many may want to go to the Cuff as the last stop, but others will wander back down to CCs.
Some general RULES:
FIRST: Wear a costume. The “true” Santacon/Santarchy uniform is a Santa suit. The March of the Mistletomosexuals is “gay Santarchy,” so our group is naturally more creative and definitely more flamboyant. Wear lights, tinsel, and GLITTER! Be a reindeer, or an elf, if you want. Heck, be a Grinch, if you like. SIMPLY WEARING A SANTA HAT IS NOT ACCEPTABLE (unless you’re otherwise nearly naked.) Not wearing a full costume is lame and we will NOT let you play our reindeer games.
FIRST: Wear a costume. The “true” Santacon/Santarchy uniform is a Santa suit. The March of the Mistletomosexuals is “gay Santarchy,” so our group is naturally more creative and definitely more flamboyant. Wear lights, tinsel, and GLITTER! Be a reindeer, or an elf, if you want. Heck, be a Grinch, if you like. SIMPLY WEARING A SANTA HAT IS NOT ACCEPTABLE (unless you’re otherwise nearly naked.) Not wearing a full costume is lame and we will NOT let you play our reindeer games.
SECOND: Please behave responsibly.
a. BRING YOUR I.D. You will not be allowed in a bar without proper identification.
b. Santa is not cheap. You WILL PAY any bar cover charges and you WILL NOT complain.
c. You will be courteous to the public. Feel free to bring candy to give to people you meet on the street. No drunken disorderliness, please.
d. At any location, we’ll linger just long enough for one quick drink. Stay with your group when they shove off to another welcoming watering ho-ho-hole.
e. If a bar is too crowded, go with a group to another one.
f. Bring enough cash to take a cab home or Uber.
a. BRING YOUR I.D. You will not be allowed in a bar without proper identification.
b. Santa is not cheap. You WILL PAY any bar cover charges and you WILL NOT complain.
c. You will be courteous to the public. Feel free to bring candy to give to people you meet on the street. No drunken disorderliness, please.
d. At any location, we’ll linger just long enough for one quick drink. Stay with your group when they shove off to another welcoming watering ho-ho-hole.
e. If a bar is too crowded, go with a group to another one.
f. Bring enough cash to take a cab home or Uber.
THIRD: It’s sad to need to mention this last bit, PLEASE do not get blitzen and walk around alone. Stay in a group. When the night is over, don’t walk back to your car or home alone. (If you’re tipsy, call a cab or Uber.) Everyone’s goal is to get home safe, alone, or with one or more Santas!
FOURTH: Be outgoing. Have FUN. SING! CHANT! CHEER! Get yourself on the naughty list (in a good way.
FOURTH: Be outgoing. Have FUN. SING! CHANT! CHEER! Get yourself on the naughty list (in a good way.
About the Author: Michael Strangeways
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